, , , , ,

Big is such an innocent word.  We use it everyday.  How often do we stop, and think about what it means?  Big means large. . .

I had a revelation today about my life, and the word big.  I come from a “big” family.  I don’t mean a lot of brothers and sisters.  I mean big people. . .large people. . .heavy people. . . .  I remember always being told that I was a “big” girl now, or some other reference to big.  Doesn’t seem like a big deal on the surface. . .

Today, I was going through my wardrobe, and sorting my clothing.  I held up a shirt that fits me, and commented how small it looked.  Then, it struck me.  It wasn’t that the shirt was small; I was using the gauge from my childhood.  I was a “big” girl now.  I stood there looking at the shirt, and pondered the meaning of “big,” and its hold over my life.

First, I’m not big.  I am an adult.  I am adult sized.  Second, I’m not a girl.  I’m not powerless like a “little” child.  I am a petite woman.  In college, I was a petite woman.  I realized that I needed to change my paridimn in my life.  Once more, I need to re-define words and phrases. 

I need to change the words that I use with my son.  I don’t want him growing up thinking that he has to be over-weight to be an adult.  I grew-up with the sub-conscious idea that an adult was “big,” and my example were people who carried extra weight.

I’m still pondering this word, and will write more later. . .

Love & Light to All. . .