Big is such an innocent word. We use it everyday. How often do we stop, and think about what it means? Big means large. . .
I had a revelation today about my life, and the word big. I come from a “big” family. I don’t mean a lot of brothers and sisters. I mean big people. . .large people. . .heavy people. . . . I remember always being told that I was a “big” girl now, or some other reference to big. Doesn’t seem like a big deal on the surface. . .
Today, I was going through my wardrobe, and sorting my clothing. I held up a shirt that fits me, and commented how small it looked. Then, it struck me. It wasn’t that the shirt was small; I was using the gauge from my childhood. I was a “big” girl now. I stood there looking at the shirt, and pondered the meaning of “big,” and its hold over my life.
First, I’m not big. I am an adult. I am adult sized. Second, I’m not a girl. I’m not powerless like a “little” child. I am a petite woman. In college, I was a petite woman. I realized that I needed to change my paridimn in my life. Once more, I need to re-define words and phrases.
I need to change the words that I use with my son. I don’t want him growing up thinking that he has to be over-weight to be an adult. I grew-up with the sub-conscious idea that an adult was “big,” and my example were people who carried extra weight.
I’m still pondering this word, and will write more later. . .
Love & Light to All. . .